As a Leading Seaman Fire Control and the Armaments Office (or XO's Writer) in HMAS DERWENT in 1978 one of my duties was to produce the weekly ship's newspaper whilst we were on our 6 month Far East Deployment.

It took off like a rocket and for the first couple of weeks I had no end of articles pouring in. But like every new toy the novelty wore off quickly. Friday mornings would find me furiously writing my own copy to provide enough material just to keep the Newspaper going. I requested from the Executive Officer (my head of department and... ... boss) permission to produce the Newspaper Fortnightly or even monthly. By this time I was almost working on the damn thing full time. He refused.

It was at this time I had my own small cocktail refrigerator, complete with wood grain veneer, located right under my desk at my feet in this very small office in the forward part of the Ship.

I was also very good mates with Peter Mayo, the boss of the unofficial chinese laundry who we had embarked in Singapore for the duration of the deployment. Peter made his semi permanent bunk up in the Gun Bay Flat, right opposite me across the Ship's main passageway.

Peter would collect the beer issue on behalf of the Chinese Laundry hands (a considerable amount of tinnies I may add) and give them to me. It was a bonus that the Chinese did not have their cans of beer opened on issue, as we did. I would store these in my cocktail fridge, sit down at my typewriter, drinking cold tinnies writing for the Ship's Paper.

Being very angry about the amount of working hours I was putting in on this damned newspaper, I decided to get my own back and to start my own 'Take The Piss", "Green Rub" cum Gossip Column. I called it "This Week Had A Few Good Days".

It wasn't long before I was daily, deluged with scandal from informers and dobbers from all messes and departments - including the Wardroom.

And the more I had to drink the more my fingers gained momentum with literary assaults upon every member of the ship's company. No one was spared from the pen including the Skipper and most of all LCDR 'Wally On The Piss' Burroughs, the XO. Maybe if I could piss him off enough he may trash the whole idea of a Ship's Newspaper.

On the contrary, he loved it, and so did everyone else onboard. Where before there was apathy now there was an electricty in the air! Every Friday as they lined up at my door, lining the main passage way waiting for me to finish running it off on the old Gestetener, collating it and stapling it and then finally distributing it.

I had made my own bed, it remained in print up until the end of the deployment. It was great for moral on what was a good ship with a damn fine crew.

So there you go - that's why I have commenced the blog, memories of better days. Where are you 'Uncle Ronnie' (CPOFC Ron Cross, the Chief Reg) and Wally On This Piss today? Whatever happened to Peter Mayo. Anyone from Derwent's Trip Up Top in 1978 remember? Post a comment.